(September 17, 2012) – Judging from my almost tearful reaction to the first part of the Real Housewives of New Jersey finale, you would have to guess that I am a former stripper who was outed on international television. I say that because, even though this episode was merely just the build up to exposing Melissa Gorga‘s embarrassment, I am too empathetic to human beings to watch this show with the “aesthetic distance” my college professors claimed is necessary to property judge art.
For the record, I was neither a dancer of any kind, nor have I ever been outed about anything, let alone something on television. Still I hated watching Kim D. gleefully anticipate the pain Melissa would feel when Creepy Angelo made his allegations that he and Melissa worked together in Lookers, a “gentleman’s club” in Elizabeth, NJ.
I very rarely make blanket statements to characterize someone, but in Kim D’s case, I have to just say it: that is one awful woman, who reeks of the sick pleasure a very bad person gets when she knows she is about to destroy someone’s reputation.
In truth it is very difficult for me to recap this episode because I find the sneer on my face too distracting to type. And ultimately nothing but Kim D’s sick plans matters enough to rehash the minutia of this episode’s events, except those that directly relate to Kim D. and whether or not Teresa Giudice knew about the plan to unmask Melissa’s alleged past.
Ultimately I don’t care that Melissa got dolled up with the help of a stylist to meet with music producers and strategize her artistic future. Ultimately I don’t care that Teresa doesn’t speak high Italian or that Caroline Manzo is dead in her eyes. After how cruelly Caroline spoke to Teresa in Napa, I think it only makes sense that Teresa is done with Mrs. Manzo. I don’t care that after a grand total of one day career in the beauty business, Caroline’s daughter, Lauren has signed a lease for the former Chateau space and is getting ready to open Cafface. At this point I don’t even care about Kathy Wakile, whom I like, and her efforts to partner with Bindi to capitalize on her culinary aspirations.
All of these fringe storylines – including Caroline telling us that she’s not worried about seeing Teresa at the annual Posche fashion show, even though she viciously attacked her in Napa – mean nothing to me whatsoever. And why would these filler scenes matter even slightly, when Kim D. is lurking at ever corner, trying to populate her fashion show to be sure the entire cast and all of Bravo’s cameras are there to humiliate Melissa and to drive a lifelong wedge in Teresa’s family life?
This weekend when I was looking at Bravo’s promotional videos for this episode, I wasn’t sure that Teresa understood the magnitude of Angelo and his allegation that Melissa danced in a nightclub. This is not because I am one of Teresa’s apologists. I have made it very clear for approximately a year that I am not one of her great champions. From the edited video I linked to on Saturday, I just wasn’t sure Teresa understood Angelo was gearing up to embarrass Melissa.
Seeing that scene in its full version, I now understand Teresa was horribly uncomfortable as Angelo tells her and Kim D. that Melissa was a dancer before she married. Teresa looked shaken up in the La Chateau Allure where Kim played straight man, feeding Angelo questions about when Melissa worked in Lookers and for how long.
Creepy, sick Kim D. is simply thrilled to watch Teresa squirm in anticipation of how Angelo’s accusations will affect Melissa. It is all so thrilling to Kim D. that she gathers her shoulders, like a little girl, who discovers in advance that she’s going to receive a pony on Christmas morning.
That is not acting. That is nothing but Kim D, a very sick woman, who is delighting in the prospect of ambushing Melissa later that night. I can’t emphasize enough how sick I think that is.
Now Teresa? She definitely gets that she is on camera, participating in a scene where her sister-in-law is being accused of a past that none of the Gorgas is going to like. She looks so nervous when Kim D. mentions that Melissa used to be “porn again,” before she is now “born again.”
I wrote this past weekend that if I were in Teresa’s shoes, I wasn’t sure I’d mention this to one of my sisters-in-law whom I do not speak with regularly. After seeing this scene, I am POSITIVE I would have. I would mention what happened with Angelo and Kim D. to anyone in my life. And I would NEVER then take a stretch limousine to an event with Kim D., the woman who obviously set up the scenarios that led up to Melissa being ambushed by Angelo at the Posche fashion show.
* There is no question that Teresa should have warned her brother and Melissa that Kim D. and Angelo were planning on trying to embarrass Melissa.
* There is no question that Bravo was behind this. Either they gave Kim D. the green light to bring Angelo in on her sick plan or they initiated it.
* There is no question that Jacqueline was enraged at Teresa prior to arriving there that night. Normally giggly Jacqueline reeked of hate, even before Angelo approached the table.
* There is no question that I will never watch this show after this season wraps. All of this comes too close to a snuff film and I refuse to spend my life watching as someone’s life gets extinguished.
This is not my idea of fun.
All photos are courtesy of BravoTV.com
About the Author (Author Profile)
I am a New York City publicist who specializes in promoting luxury products and experiences and occasionally moonlight as a journalist.
Relatively new to the world of blogging, I have watched and enjoyed Bravo’s Housewives shows since the first season of the Real Housewives of Orange County. I created this blog over the 4th of July holiday of 2011 because I enjoy writing and love to figure out how to blend images and words to create something that is both visually compelling and interesting to read.